I am a pretty anxious person by nature. I'm also a pitbull. I refuse to give into fear, so via exercise, writing, prayer, healthy food, and never to be underestimated - thrift store shopping - I somehow manage to tame the beast.

What I can't control for some reason, though, are bees. I am their honey, their nectar and their pin cushion. A few years ago, at a lovely outdoor birthday party, one found its way into my shirt and stung me on the boob.

Last Friday, while chugging up a hill and breathing in the invigorating Fall air, a yellow jacket landed on my face, stung me on the ear, then died in my hair.

Then there's my neighbors' home. If we are The Cleavers with our 1950's two story, replete with roses, a rocking chair, geraniums and a red door, they are the Munsters with the plywood of their roof exposed, crab grass, broken fireplace (never fixed from the 1994 earthquake), unfilled pool (minus a shallow pond...those poor mosquitoes need a home, too!) and massive BEE HIVE.

I am fine with this joint looking like a storage unit for hermits. I am not fine my kids dying from West Nile Virus, slipping into his cement eye sore of a swimming hole, or STEPPING ON BEES. The last part has happened twice.

Here's how much of a peacekeeper I am - I have yet to call the city. But my fingers, like the President over the red button during the Cold War, are feeling trigger happy. Then again, with our winds and rain this winter, perhaps Mother Nature will take care of the problem herself. Then Rex and I can buy the lot, bull doze the house, and buy a flock of goats. Then WE can be the irritating neighbors! Baaaaaahhhhhhhhhh!

Happy Thursday.


More of my writing can be found daily at BabyCenter and Good Housekeeping.




 


Comments

Thu, 13 Nov 2008 09:49:51

Our lovely neighbors let their 3 chihuahuas run free and have two, count 'em two! rusting dishwashers in their backyard, and let us not forget the 2 rusting junkers.

I'm from Arkansas, I don't want to LIVE there!

 

Thu, 13 Nov 2008 11:26:31

A "flock" of goats. huh? Will they be flying goats perhaps? Just razzing you. A Vermont girl has a right to do that to an L.A. Woman. For the record, Esther would talk Pip into letting her wear that leopard print bikini in no time.
So much for unhooking the computer. I'm back already. "Oh just one more thing...."

 

Thu, 13 Nov 2008 11:34:15

Of course we all know that sheeps can fly:)

 

Thu, 13 Nov 2008 12:57:15

Did you really get stung on your boob? LOL!

 

Thu, 13 Nov 2008 16:47:34

I bet Rex kinda liked that booby-bee sting. Just keepin' it real. Sorry though. Man...your neighbors actually do take the cake. I'd be trigger happy, too, and I'm pretty "live and let live". C'mon though. That looks like a health department nightmare.

 

Thu, 13 Nov 2008 18:58:48

My sister stepped on a bee once when we were smaller. Coincidentally, she was licking honey off a spoon when it happened. We always told her the bees were getting revenge.

 

Thu, 13 Nov 2008 21:32:57

You and my daughter. Noone in the family gets stung but her.

I wonder if you could buy a can of bee killer (Raid) and leave it on their front porch?? B/c I guess a friendly conversation is out of the question, huh?

 

Sat, 15 Nov 2008 14:01:26

Flock of Goats? Sound like the name of a punk band.

 

Mon, 17 Nov 2008 10:50:58

My girl got a wasp stuck under her dress once and got about five stings...I am so blessed that she wasn't allergic, and now, she has a healthy fear of them...but she still loves worms. She says the pink ones are her favorites.

 

Wed, 19 Nov 2008 01:40:16

Well, I won't add my wasp story. And I agree, flock of goats sounds like a name of a punk band....but a kinda straight one. :))

 



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